As your children grow up, there are a number of conversations you’ll have to have with them. Often we think the big one is the one about the “birds and the bees”, and while that is an important conversation, they also learn about that in school.

What isn’t covered as much is the impact alcohol can have on a young person’s life. It’s an important conversation to have, and many of us avoid it before it’s too late. There’s an alarming growth in the number of teenagers consuming alcohol these days and many addiction centres such as UKAT are seeing more people coming through the doors for rehab treatment than ever before.

You don’t want that to be your child, so having a conversation about alcohol with your children is a must. So, what should you say?

Well, firstly get the tone right

First and foremost you need to get the tone right, or it could go in one ear and out of the other. Don’t make it a lecture or make it feel like you’re having a go at them. It needs to be an open conversation rather than judgemental, after all the chances are that they’ve seen you drink.

Ensure that they are allowed to ask questions, and that you are able to answer them openly and honestly. If you’ve had problems with alcohol, discuss them and the impact it had on your life.

Time it right

Don’t grab your child a few minutes before they head out to go and see friends. Or just as they’re about to go to sleep. Timing is crucial, in exactly the same way the sexual education talk is.

It should be done when your relationship with your child is good, and approach it as part of a wider topic of conversations about growing up. By being calm and doing it when there is no tension, it will have a much larger impact on their thinking and decisions on drinking.

Set rules

Don’t be afraid to set rules. While teenagers do like to push boundaries, the facts are that they do feel safer when they have guidelines in place, which can be vital when it comes to alcohol.

Issue a set of rules and have consequences in place should they break those rules. This clear boundary setting will help them establish what’s right and wrong and set them on a pathway that will hopefully not involve alcohol abuse.

Make sure any ‘punishments’ come with a fair and honest chat about where they could have made better choices. Everyone feels awful when they have made a mistake and we don’t learn from this by having more confrontations and no understanding of each other.

These are not easy conversations to have but if young adults know they have a safe place to turn to where they will always be loved no matter what they’ve done they are more likely to stay on an even path.

Disclosure: This is a collaborative post.